8.28.2010

Martha Stewart's guide to tent living for the deployed

So, here we are. We're finally in the tents. Every other crew has been in them and they've complained about our good fortune for the last couple of months. I'm happy to oblige whiners as usually they're hypocrisy stands out!!! As usual team Varsity handles it with style. We just got our tent assignments and went and checked our tent out.

It's not the Hilton but compared to what the marines and soldiers suffer through at remote outposts I'll take it. It's got pretty decent ac. I froze my ass off because I initially didn't want to zip up my cold weather Marmot sleeping bag.....Stupid is as stupid does!!!! It's got bright flourescent lights so I took some initiative and built my fort first. All the linens look like I went to a Salvation Army center. Pictures will be forthcoming. I got a heavy blanket and made a little hanging curtain.

It's tough trying to sleep because everyone sleeps in a different way. Some go to bed early, some late, some never. Half the lights are on till well after 1-2 in the morning so not making yourself a little curtain is tantamount to the onset of insomnia. I didn't put any earplugs in as I was tired to begin with after being up 18 hours and for operating an aircraft for 16.5. 12 hours of flying and 4.5 of ground gaggle. So I fell asleep quite readily only to be awoken by a cold draft eminating from the ceiling blowers. The outside air temperature had fallen to 96 F (32 C for you Canadians:) and the movement inside had ceased long enough for the cooldown to begin. That will not happen this evening as I am getting up at 2:45 am to go fly tomorrow.

We were greeted by the Djiboutian Anthem promptly at 8 am followed by the national anthem. OMG is it loud!!! Very military sounding BTW. After that it was off to the showers. Any of my flying buddies will tell you that showers vary from bad to worse. As far as these go they are awesome!!! Water so hot it burns Djibouti film right off of you!!!! They are actual shower heads with a single adjustable handle and the sinks are decent. Last time I was at Djibouti it had smaller tents and solar still showers!!! Now you can shower without worrying about getting water in your mouth for fear of throwing up your chow!!!
It's actually posted by the environmental health technicians that the water is now potable and you will no longer use bottled water. Is that just like the announcement that there are no ill effects of the burn pits at all the lovely places I've stayed at, or transited, in the middle east? As Austin Powers says, "Riiigghht."

After showering, Shawn and I took a lovely stroll in the beautiful sunlight and 105 degree heat. Did I mention that it's a desert so it's really a dry heat? Except that it's adjacent to the Gulf of Aden so we have that pesky little thing called humidity. We found the computer place where you take your laptop to have it configured to work on the mil net. Then it was off to order some morale patches and such at the little souvenier shop.

That's right. The Phillipinos have opened an embroidery shop where the guy does it all by hand. I'm having an arabic nametag made with my wings on it. The things you do to entertain yourself. After that it was off to Brunch at the chow hall. What a great way to spend a Saturday? I had a tasty turkey breast with potato wedges and gravy. Then I snacked on spaghetti sauce with meatballs and put in this awesome garlic bread. Believe it or not the food is excellent unless you are in the fast food line. Then it's buyer beware as I just had a snack of onion rings that were made four hours ago.....Pepto!!!!

Now we're hangin' at 11 degrees north, a morale, welfare, and recreation oasis. They have fast wifi and everyone in here is lounging around bangin' out on their keyboards or catching up with Family Guy. Some are waiting to skype the family back home as dawn approaches. It's 14:29 here so my sweet lady isn't up yet, unless the dog is licking her face right now. Okay this is ridiculous. They are playing some really stupid piano music like, "We've only just begun"!!! Are you f*ing shittin' me? Is that what the troops need to hear? It's just the kind of music i like to play on my Ipod as we approach an assault strip for a tactical landing!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT!!!!! Throw some Halen or Iron Maiden in there and I'm rollin' Let one of those bad dudes throw something our way we'd have the SEALS send them packing. This music would just embolden the enemy to attack us while we're all holding each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, not even halfway through my day and that's where I've been and what I've done. On tap for the rest of the afternoon before I shower and sleep......chow!!!!! I regret not getting French toast this morning. That also will not happen again. 20 days until I see my sweet bee!!!!! Then I take a year off and do it all over again in September. But that will be another blog entirely. Tomorrow it's the assualt strip and buying Tuskar beer!!!

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